How Teaching My Kids Goal-Setting Skills Saved My Sanity

How Teaching My Kids Goal-Setting Skills Saved My Sanity

taayoo murrayTaayoo Murray
Mom of Two


Parenting is hard. Correction, parenting is hard AF. We spend all our time basically trying to keep them alive, making sure they eat, get to school and stay healthy. And that’s the bare minimum. There are a plethora of life skills that they need to learn.

How do we do this while holding down a full-time job and in many cases a successful marriage?

This was my dilemma about five years ago. I am a boy mom. At that time my boys were eleven and seven years old respectively. Every day I felt like I was drowning. So many demands and not enough time. There had to be another way. How could I give my boys more autonomy with the confidence to start taking on age-appropriate responsibilities? My solution was to teach them goal-setting principles. The objective was making them conscious goal setters. This literally saved my sanity. Here are some tangible changes I saw with my boys.

goal setting

My boys became more empowered

Every Sunday, the boys would set three goals for the week, then plan how to achieve them. I didn’t dictate their goals; it was totally up to them. This gave them total control over what they achieved every week. They didn’t always achieve all their goals, but the result was two boys empowered to take charge of their weeks. These skill sets transferred into their schoolwork and sports. We don’t fight over grades and homework. Good grades are necessary for them to hit their own goals, so they get it done.

My boys’ confidence grew

There’s nothing greater than planning to hit a target and achieve! Over time, the boys developed so much confidence and were undaunted by challenges. Everything and every opportunity was fair game. They set goals, figured out how to achieve them, and hit the ground running.

The boys learned crucial life skills

The more empowered and confident the boys became, the more responsibilities they were able to take on. Gradually things turned for the better. Right now, I have boys who alternate doing dishes and cleaning the kitchen every night. Boys who do laundry for the entire household and clean the bathrooms. Boys who make beds and tidy their rooms. I try every day not to take them for granted.

As a boy mom, I am guaranteed to lose my cool often. However, teaching my boys goal setting has kept me from going over the edge.


Taayoo MurrayAbout Taayoo Murray

Taayoo is a boy mom, who spends most of her time cheering from the sidelines of a soccer field or scouring bookstores searching for that new zombie series. During nine to five, she uses her signature program “Making Me Happen” to teach tweens/teens goal-setting skills that empower them.

View all posts by Taayoo Murray here.

kids goal setting


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